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I was working on a theater. They had engaged the services of a famous acoustical consulting company to improve the acoustics in the theater. They paid them $20,000. and the consultants sent a blueprint of some baffels to be placed on the walls. The theater had them made up and called the consultants to tell them where they had specified the panels to be placed was not possible. The panels would have been blocking HVAC vents, windows and handrails. Would they please send someone out to specifiy the correct locations? No one came. The theater called the consultants again and again over the course of 8 months. Finally, they got a consultant on the phone and he told them : "just put them anywhere".


I get a call from one of my church customers that their wireless lavalier microphone is acting funny. I go down there and find the Pastor has cut off the little antenna that hangs off the bodypack.

I get a call from one of my church customers that their wireless lavalier microphone doesn't work. The Pastor says everything is on and he even has a red light on his bodypack, so why no sound?

We're supplying a system to a theater for a big show. The promoter says they've engaged a Big Time sound "engineer" to mix the show and they want Brand X mixing console. No big deal, we sub rent it. Big Time comes up and I say "System sounds great, we've checked the backline and your Left and Right is on matrix 1 & 2." Big Time says "What's a matrix?"

I'm recording a bands demo in a small studio. Everthing's fine except I tell the guitarist he's out of tune. He says "Really, which string?"

Great American Hero's
Smokey Yunick
Smokey has passed away but he left behind a great autobiography "The Best Damn Garage In Town"
One of the best books I've ever read.

Carol Kaye
An LA studio musician who played on so many great records:
A more detailed list of Carol Kaye's electric bass session work: The Beach Boys: "Wouldn't It Be Nice," "Help Me Rhonda," "Good Vibrations," "Caroline No," "Sloop John B," "Heroes and Villains," "California Girls," most of Pet Sounds LP. Electric guitar on an earlier hit, "Surfin' USA." Plus work for Joe Cocker ("Feelin' Alright") Barbra Streisand ("The Way We Were"), the Marketts ("Batman Theme"), Simon & Garfunkel ("Homeward Bound"), the Righteous Brothers ("Soul & Inspiration"), Ike and Tina Turner ("River Deep Mountain High"), Ray Charles ("America The Beautiful" & "Don't Change On Me" & "I Don't Need No Doctor" & "I Chose To Sing The Blues" & "Understanding" & "Feel So Bad") Brenda Holloway ("You Made Me So Very Happy"), Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass ("Whipped Cream"), Andy Williams ("Love Story"), Lou Rawls (""Natural Man," "Unforgettable" and "Tobacco Road"), Glen Campbell ("Wichita Lineman" and others), Motherlode ("When I Die"), Frank and Nancy Sinatra ("Something Stupid"), Nancy Sinatra ("These Boots Are Made For Walkin'," "Sugar Town") plus the Monkees, Gary Lewis & the Playboys, the Buckinghams, Paul Revere & the Raiders, Gary Usher, Gary Puckett and Union Gap, Bill Cosby ("Hikky Burr" with him and Quincy Jones, "Chump Change" with Quincy also). Did over 10,000 recording sessions in Los Angeles. Was first call on elecric bass from 1964 through about 1974, but played electric bass on all sessions from 1963 through last thing I did, the theme for "Soap" TV series (1981). Guitar hits: "La Bamba" Ritchie Valens, "Zippity Doo Dah" Bob B. Soxx & Blue Jeans, "Unchained Melody" & "You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'" Righteous Bros., "The Beat Goes On" (he used my bass line doubled with bassist Bob West) & "He's A Rebel", "I Got You Babe" & "Baby Don't Go" & "All I Really want To Do)" & "Bang Bang" Sonny & Cher (& "Alfie" Cher), "Danke Shoen" Wayne Newton, "Mexican Shuffle" Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass, "Mothers Of Invention & Freak Out LPs w/Frank Zappa.

TV Shows: "Mission Impossible", "M.A.S.H.", "Room 222", Kojac, "Hawaii 5-O" (played bass on Ventures' thing of this), "Ironside", "McCloud," "Addams Family," first Cosby TV (Quincy Jones), "The Streets Of San Francisco," "Brady Bunch," "Hogan's Heroes," "Alice," "Cannon," "Soap," "The Paper Chase," "Mannix," "It Takes A Thief," "Wonder Woman," "Peyton Place," "The Love Boat," "Get Smart," "FBI," etc. A few movies: "Airport," "The Thomas Crown Affair," "Walk, Don't Run," "Sweet Charity," "The New Centurions," "The Pawnbroker," "Slender Thread," "Plaza Suite," "Smokey and the Bandit," "Guess Who's Coming To Dinner," "Beneath The Planet of the Apes."